I counted and I have 13 story starts - all of which could develop into novels. Every one of them are interesting and unique (I am biased, but I think so.)
I am finally frustrated enough to END this cycle and figure out why I do this.
I was praying this morning, asking God why I do this. It causes me great stress to know I have not finished something that, at one point in time, was very important for my creative self. I feel that my needs are not as important as those of others.
When praying, the realization came to my mind, (as it has many times before), that I must put my oxygen mask on before I can help another do the same. While praying, I also felt the urge to drink more water - which will help me heal. God is so good to me, giving me answers I need at the moment.
Hang on, let me refill my water glass. God truly does know what is best for me.
I know I wrote about this before. I only procrastinate and put aside things that are personal to me. I take my day job very seriously and put those tasks and projects in front of everything else. I also put the needs of my family in front of my own when it comes to completing things that are important to only me. I have damaged my health and healing, as I caused myself internal bleeding and various complications that delayed my healing after surgery. I constantly fail to set up boundaries to the point of almost losing my life.
After praying and drinking more water, I felt the urge to complete a quilt that I started. And guess what? I did! I finished it and am very pleased with the result. During the course of working on the project, I used up a spool of thread. This is a very small thing, but I felt good that I had finished that spool. The empty spool urged me on to finish the entire quilt. It turned out very nice for a first attempt at a split rail pattern with no help. Perhaps I will be brave enough to post a picture. Actually, with no blog followers, I guess it doesn't matter if I post a photo or not. That is beside the point. I am pleased, and I feel God is pleased too.
Are there projects you want or need to finish? Why not work on them as though you were eating an elephant - one bite at a time.
Is there a scrapbook you've started? Perhaps it is a quilt or a crochet project that keeps nagging at you. How about self care like going for a daily walk or journaling? I recommend making a list, and checking these things off as you complete them. This works for me with my work projects - so I know it will work for personal ones. I am making my list now, as I write this.
I recommend praying for guidance, spend time alone with our Savior, Jesus Christ. The prayer closet is where I often find the most peace and I can be open. He loves you and wants what is best for you - so do I.
Psalm 146 NIV
1 Praise the LORD. Praise the LORD, O my soul.
2 I will praise the LORD all my life; I will sing praise to my God as long as I live.
3 Do not put your trust in princes, in mortal men, who cannot save.
4 When their spirit departs, they return to the ground; on that very day their plans come to nothing.
5 Blessed is he whose help is the God of Jacob, whose hope is in the LORD his God,
6 the Maker of heaven and earth, the sea, and everything in them-- the LORD, who remains faithful forever.
7 He upholdsthe cause of the oppressed and gives food to the hungry. The LORD sets prisoners free,
8 the LORD gives sight to the blind, the LORD lifts up those who are bowed down, the LORD loves the righteous.
9 The LORD watches over the alien and sustains the fatherless and the widow, but he frustrates the ways of the wicked.
10 The LORD reigns forever, your God, O Zion, for all generations. Praise the LORD.
